Dealing with overwhelming emotions can be difficult and interfere with our daily lives. Emotional overwhelm can be an intense and distressing experience that can feel all-consuming. It can be difficult to manage and can interfere with our daily lives, causing feelings of anxiety, depression, anger, or sadness. These emotions can be so strong that they may feel impossible to control or escape from.
Common triggers include relationship problems, work stress, financial difficulties, or health concerns. Understanding what we can do about our emotional states is an important step to becoming emotionally skilful.
There are three main strategies for dealing with difficult emotions: dampen, discharge, and processing.
Dampening emotions involves techniques that can reduce the intensity of emotions by dampening down the bodily or physiological responses to emotions.
Our emotions trigger our fight/flight response, which can intensify our emotional experience, creating a positive feedback loop. To break this cycle, we can use techniques that reduce our physiological responses to emotions, thus decreasing the intensity of our emotions. Some of these techniques involve stimulating the vagal nerve, which acts as a brake to slow the heart rate. Other techniques involve restoring the balance of blood gases that become imbalanced when our bodies experience emotional activation without a corresponding physical response.
Vagus nerve activation:
- Leg inversion (lay on your back with your legs up a wall for 10 mins)
- Bearing down (will increase pressure on internal organs)
- Humming, singing, dancing, shaking and chanting
Restoring the balance of blood gases can help correct the level of CO2 in our bloodstream. When we experience distress, our heart and breathing rates increase, causing us to lose more CO2. While this is helpful in a fight-or-flight situation, it can be problematic in daily activities.
- Intense physical activity. This may be a sprint or some heavy deadlifts. As little as 60 seconds of intense physical activity can resolve emotionally aroused states by increasing blood CO2.
- Slow breathing (e.g. box breathing). The breathing rate is slowed to one breath every 15 seconds for 2 mins
Discharging emotions involves finding ways to release them without regret or shame. Here are some examples to discharge commonly felt overwhelming emotions.
In fear, the natural impulse is to flee. Here are some actions which help discharge that feeling:
- Running or climb the stairs
- Pacing quickly
- Exercising with moderate-high intensity
When experiencing sadness, our natural inclination is to seek connection, but we may isolate ourselves because we feel like a burden. To discharge feelings of sadness, we can try the following actions:
- Vent to someone
- Journal or write poetry
- Hug someone
In anger, the natural itch is to attack. Attack is typically regrettable, so here are some alternative ways to release feelings of anger:
- Punch and kick a punching bag, pad or a mattress
- Throw a ball against the wall
- Intense physical activity (short); running, skipping, burpees, jumping jacks, cutting wood.
- Screaming, swearing or yelling in a place that is appropriate (an isolated beach, in the forest, or in your pillow)
Lastly, emotional processing involves learning to observe your emotions and recognizing your emotional states. This requires a deliberate practice of emotional awareness. It’s a skill worth cultivating. By practicing deliberate thought and emotional awareness, you can shift your perspective from solely feeling angry to becoming aware of the anger without letting it take control over you. Through daily practice over time, you can learn to observe your internal emotional states, rather than being consumed by them.
Managing emotions can be challenging, but by practicing these strategies, you can become more emotionally skilled and better equipped to handle emotional overwhelm. It’s important to remember that seeking professional help, such as therapy, can also be beneficial in managing overwhelming emotions.
By Ampara Bouwens
Ampara is an experienced Clinical Psychologist with over 19 years of experience, providing mental health services in private, governmental, and corporate sectors. She specializes in complex trauma, personality disorders, and other severe disorders, using a compassionate and non-judgmental approach to help clients regain control and autonomy over their lives. Since moving to New Zealand in 2016, Ampara has been running a successful private practice, offering personalised and effective treatment to individuals seeking to improve their mental health and well-being. Ampara is also the clinical lead and founder of MindGarage – a leading provider of psychological services, treatment, and assessment, with a team of skilled therapists who provide high-quality, personalised treatment via the same compassionate, non-judgmental approach. The MindGarage team takes a holistic approach to therapy, considering all aspects of a client’s life and offering tailor-made services to meet individual needs. MindGarage believes in empowering clients with the skills and knowledge needed to make positive changes in their lives, promoting long-term mental and emotional health.
Visit Ampara online: https://amparabouwens.co.nz/